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Had they only asked, I could have told these South Carolinians about this recordingartist, author, and political activist, Bob Miller. The very first thing I wouldhave told this group was not to wear white to the meeting. No--they were notinterested what I had to say--they just wanted to be entertained and save a buck atthe same time. The initial cost I'm sure was less than some of the big name speakersget, but that's before the cost of several years of psychoanalysis that's needed toget over one of Miller's speeches is factored in.
Miller started off on the right track to win the hearts of farmers everywhere, butit was to be short-lived "Since I have picked my share of cotton--by hand I might add and walked behind mulesfrom sun up to sun down trying my best to keep the plow point going in the rightdirection without hitting a stump or root, and have cut fodder and pulled corn untilmy hands bled, I do not need someone to explain the drudgery and hardships of farmlife to me."
My gosh, you would have thought George W. Bush had walked in, cheers rang out thatyou could have heard in Utah, but an entirely different message was on its way toUtah. It was like wham, bam, thank you maÂ'am. Hate to eat and run, but got to go.One thing for sure, Miller didn't pick up where he left off "My question is: Whyare farmers so worried about the pennies blacks get in social aid; that Mexicanworkers get paid to gather crops that no one else wants to harvest? Especially,since half of the farmers today are not farming, they're living--and I might addquite well--off big government and Willie Nelson's farm aid programs."
Some still had a smile on their faces as they looked at each other as if to say,"Please pinch me, I'm dreaming". But they were not dreaming and things were going toget worse "Farmers have been whining about big government for years while fightingto be the first in line for the handouts. They whine about illegal aliens bringingdrugs into this country while they grow tobacco, one of the most deadly drugs theworld has ever known. These whining hypocrites murder more people worldwide on adaily basis with their crop than illegal drugs and Osama bin Laden and his crew doin a year. And wouldn't you know it, a so-called Christian and Republican strongholdis South Carolina, a tobacco producer from way back."
The good news is a guy who had a hearing aid on both ears and me were the only oneswho were not on their way out of the room and heard Miller's closing argument ."These Christians had better hope God don't decide to rid the world of murderinghypocrites. If so, His first stop might very well be South Carolina. From there he'dmove on to Utah and put a stop to the group sex parties. Sooner or later He'd end upin Rome to find out why His church had been trying to cover up and protectpedophiles."
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bo bmillerwrites.com is an eclectic online publication that is updated each week. NanKilar reviews books; Bob Miller writes books, short stories and articles. He'sauthored seven books. Served as a pilot in Vietnam (1969-70). Awarded theDistinguished Flying Cross and the Air Medal. Challenged Richard Shelby for a seatin U.S. Senate in 1992. He is considered one of America's most controversialwriters.
